dreaming?

was it a dream that i was dreaming?

last week.. hmmm.. saturday.. i was in our store and the second floor has a room a bed obviously so i got the chance to sleep after lunch.. i always do that no wonder my tummy is really starting to bulge!!

anyway this has happened to me trice already... so i fell asleep after my mind went completely insane thinking all sorts of stuff.. from killing my brother to all sorts of kinky stuff to having superpowers!

then i woke up.. i cant open my eyes.. i dont have goddam muta mind you but i simply just cant open it.. like some unexplainable force kept it shut.. i then suddenly realized its not just my eyes.. i cant move my arms my legs my head.. everything.. now was i fucking dreaming? fuck! i dont even know! seriously..

this was what happened the first 2 times.. last saturday was a bit different its crazy.. i thought i was goin insane.. its the same thing, i cant fucking move! but this time i thought i saw someone moving.. i think that was how i woke up.. i felt it.. i cant open my eyes completely, only enough to peer a little of my soroundings.. i forced myself to move.. my fingers moved a bit i tried to pinch myself so i wud wake up if it was even a dream, that i still dont know..

and so i finally managed to move.. i was still so sleepy then.. so i layed (fucked! how do you spell it! lyed? lied? anyway humiga uli ako) back down.. and as soon as i was just trying to sleep i froze again.. fuck it.. i cant move my body again.. so i quickly struggled.. and after i got up damn it i just decided to go back home..

was it a dream? i dont know.. it feels real.. and it has happened to me numerous times.. is there a ghost then? i dont know.. maybe.. coz many years ago our shop has ghosts in it.. not before my parents bought some stuff to keep dem away.. maybe the ward has been broken..

it has NEVER happened here at home.. it only happens when i sleep at our store..

was it a dream? damn it..
or maybe i was drifting to another plane..
maybe my spirit was pulling away from my body..
weird..
i think too much.. (sigh)

i actually want it to happen again.. this time maybe try to do some weird things like maybe imagine myself transported to another dimension.. im really curious.. i want it to happen again..

all i know is that it feels too real.. too real to be a friggin dream.